The Shorthorn - The ‘T’ in Thanksgiving Means Tolerance

The ‘T’ in Thanksgiving Means Tolerance

Written by Julie Sanchez for The Shorthorn editorial board

Tuesday, 25 November 2008 05:21 PM

Editorial Roundup
The issue: The Thanksgiving Holiday is upon us.
We suggest: Take a break from studying, think about what you’re thankful for, and enjoy the day-long turkey binge.

Thanksgiving is a funny holiday. It’s meant to celebrate family, togetherness and being thankful for something. The majority of us can’t stand our family the rest of the year, but for the savory flavor of turkey and stuffing, we endure their shenanigans every fourth Thursday in November.

If the Native Americans and English settlers could stand each other during the first Thanksgiving, even though they harbored ill feelings toward each other, so can you.

There are other reasons to show up for Thanksgiving dinner besides the food. If you’re planning to come out of the closet, or reveal you’re having a sex change, this is the day to do it. Shock value to the family dinner adds more sweetness to the canned cranberry sauce.

It’s also fun to see a family’s different personality types clash at the dinner table. Don’t sit next to Uncle Freddy! He’ll either try to hit on you, or give you a “sensual” back rub, which will upset your Aunt Linda, and you’ll lose out on eating her incredible pecan pie. Do not pay attention to what your Grandma says regarding your appearance or love life. She’s just a bitter, old hag who will likely croak soon.

This holiday is also appropriate because the weight gain from the turkey meal and endless pieces of pie will prepare you for the winter season. Extra fat means extra warmth — you don’t have to rely on that unsightly parka. Sure, your beloved will probably physically despise you, but at least you’ll save on your heating bill.

The most important thing to remember during the Thanksgiving holiday: Finals week is near. Use the break to decompress and think about what you’re thankful for.

Remember that we are in critical times right now, with a shaky economy and uncertainty in the world, and spending time with family should be a priority this one day. Of course, use the time after Thanksgiving to study for final exams, finish final projects and turn to the leftover turkey as sustenance for late night cram sessions.

— Julie Sanchez for The Shorthorn editorial board

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Last Updated ( Tuesday, 20 January 2009 05:16 PM )

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